A blog that was supposed be made up of bits about cab rides and blurbs about beauty products but, instead, is about other things.



"This is going to end up on your blog, isn't it," they said as we rode back to town.
(Over a bridge that didn't cross the Mississippi but did let us out on Delancey Street.)

Yes, but I don't remember what "it" was.


Take the ferry.

As per the last post, and ensuing discussion with others:

we love you, Oregon Trail.


Ford it?

I'm not one to sing the praises of the flatlands, but I just crossed the Mississippi River in a rental car that costs $13.10 a day.

(I should map how far $13.10 would take me in a cab. 65th Street, I think.)

Earlier today I was in the Mall of America.

It was good to see an Ikea near so much sky.


Busomy hills

I'm off to where they don't have taxis.
Corn on the cob, but not corn-colored cabs.

I return on Monday.


Hidden cab content

A few unrelated people wrote to tell me that in this piece, David Sedaris gets to cabs in a manner similar to mine.

I guess I agree.

I love that they chose a cab to illustrate the article -- primarily because it appears to be largely about sick sex with animals.
(Although I've only read the online excerpt, so this whole post could be rendered false after a trip to the newsstand.)

Town and Country: One man’s journey into the dark (and filthy) heart of the American class system. (GQ)



"Look," she said. "I tell them that the story they're imagining is probably far more interesting than the real one."

"And you're not in this business to entertain."

I've found my new best friend.




"Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg signed a bill yesterday that requires the Taxi and Limousine Commission to approve, within 90 days, at least one hybrid vehicle model for use as a taxicab. The City Council members who introduced the measure said they did so because no alternative-fuel vehicles are in use, even though a Council bill in 2003 called for the sale of special medallions to encourage the use of cleaner fuels. Environmentalists applauded the bill signing. One of them, Marcia Bystryn, the executive director of the New York League of Conservation Voters, said that hybrid cars have far greater fuel efficiency because they combine a small gasoline engine with an electric motor that recharges automatically." Sewell Chan (NYT)


Death Cab*

I've seen Death Cab for Cutie in concert.
But I just remembered this.
And, despite hours of OC viewing, I haven't a clue what they sound like.
But I should.
I think.
Maybe someone will make me a mixtape...

*It was only a matter of time before I went here, obviously.



"Is she pretty," he asked, pointing to her photo.

"Not as pretty as she should be."


Not a knock knock joke

My mom went to the gynecologist the other day.

"How was your weekend," she asked.

"Good," he said, although he'd spent most of his time driving his daughter and her friends to and from various bar mitzvah services and parties.

"Oh," she said. And then, "They don't rent school buses anymore?"

"No. They stopped doing that after the children started giving eachother blowjobs during the rides between Temple Shalom and The Grand Marquis."

A school bus is, of course, the same color as a taxi.



I wish you could give someone a gift certificate for taxi fare.



"The two men were arrested after the taxi in which they were riding was stopped at a checkpoint near Balad, 50 miles north of Baghdad, and a search of the vehicle turned up 35 washing-machine timers, devices that military officials said were sometimes used by Iraqi insurgents in making bombs."

American Filmmaker Held by the U.S. Military in Iraq for 7 Weeks Is Released (NYT)


And if we talk, communication.

"I like your phone," he said.

"I like your c.d.," I said.

I left with my packages and hailed a cab.
I wish I'd asked him to come along for the ride.

(I had a kiwi and a packet of spoons in my bag.)



Found in my notepad:
  • 5D25: mean driver, 14th to North 6th, Williamsburg

I recall no details.

(Save for the broken L train.)


empty ashtray

"Well, I do run Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em Mondays," he said, apropos of nothing.

I've often had visions of lighting up and resting my arm on the opened window while being whisked home late at night.
What glamour!

But it was Tuesday.
And I don't carry cigarettes.


On walking

Tonight I did not take a cab.
I did, however, wear two different shoes.

(I did not notice this until the subway ride home.)



The cab driver and I had brunch today.
He didn’t know it though.
He never once turned his head.
To Brooklyn, and step on it.
(I said in my head.)
(I’ve yet to try it out loud, in a cab.)
But he took the wrong bridge.
So we sat in traffic long enough for me to eat my bagel, and for him to eat his bagel, and for me not to offer a napkin to him.
He was silent.
And I didn’t want to cross any lines.
We listened to “Listen to Your Heart.”
And to 1010WINS.


one for the road

Sometimes I love headlines:

I do not, however, love abbreviations.



Another helpful article could be created by a simple comma move.

jensnow(AT)gmail(DOT)com. All content Copyright 2008. You can visit me at Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About (thingsidontunderstandand.tumblr.com) and at www.jensnow.com.